20 Things That Will Probably Never Happen In Ottawa
Naw, sorry.
November 22, 2016, 10:47 AM
September 24, 2021, 10:29 AM
A lot of things happen here. Actually, they don't. But we can pretend they do.
Let's rephrase that. We expect a lot of things to happen here in Ottawa. Whether it's that your bus will get stuck in a large pile of snow, or that you can always expect to be anxious driving beside a cyclist. It's just normal, everyday things that happen here in Ottawa.
But what about things that will never happen here? Will we be so lucky as to have BeaverTails deliver? Will we ever win the Stanley Cup? Probably not. But lets view the list of things that probably won't ever happen in Ottawa, and prepare ourselves to be upset.
1. No one rings the bell at Baseline Station for one day
2. Someone willingly moves to Barrhaven
3. Cycling becomes safe downtown
4. Bridgehead becomes more popular than Tim Hortons
5. Kanye West actually moves here
6. Ottawa becomes the hotspot for concerts
7. There is perfect weather in Ottawa and...
8. No one complains about the weather for one day
9. Bus fares decreasing and never increasing again
10. The Ottawa Senators bring home the Stanley Cup
11. Justin Trudeau and Barack Obama's have a bro-vacation here
12. A movie set in Ottawa wins an Academy Award
13. A new and amazing bar/club opens up downtown every month replacing old ones
14. We're actually known as the capital of Canada worldwide
15. People love the Chateau Laurier expansion
16. There's a BeaverTail shack at every major corner in the city
17. The LRT gets finished exactly when it's planned to be
18. You meet the love of your life at Tequila Jacks
19. The Canal becomes clean enough to swim in
20. All of these celebrities miss living in Ottawa so much, that they move back and Ottawa becomes the new Toronto
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