The Government Of Canada Has An Online Guide Dedicated Entirely To Goose Vs Human Conflicts
While Canada may be known internationally for moose and beavers, if there is one animal notoriously known by locals throughout the country, it's Canadian geese. These days, it's practically impossible to find someone who hasn't had a near-death experience with a Canada goose at some point. The bold animal is literally the epitome of "make me" and the growing fear Canadians have of the sometimes aggressive animal has resulted in some hilarious footage, to say the least.
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While it's practically a general consensus amongst Canadians at this point to stay as far away from Canadian geese as possible, it didn't necessarily seem like the kind of topic the government would pay attention to. Especially considering at the end of the day, it's just a damn goose.
Alas, the government of Canada is proving yet again we must be living in a simulation because there is a literal webpage on the official government of Canada website dedicated to geese interactions:
Surprisingly, the information on Canada geese is extensive on the site. Detailing general information about the species, it's origination, migrating patterns and other helpful information for anyone curious. Though the hilarious bit about the webpage is the extent of information on "conflict resolution" with Canadian geese, because apparently, the government of Canada's side job is acting as a peacekeeper between Canadians and local wildlife:
My personal favourite topic questions would have to be "what is the advantage for me to develop a good management plan?", "what can municipal governments do to reduce conflicts with Canada geese?" and "am I eligible to receive a Damage and Danger permit?" At this point, if you removed the word "geese" from the forum, you'd assume the questions were about an actual person.
Clearly if you ever run into issues with a Canada goose, there are more than enough resources to know your rights (?) or learn how to "resolve the conflict". It all seems ridiculous, but considering the number of brawls that occur with overconfident Canadians and stubborn local geese, maybe this page is more necessary than we'd like to admit.


